Really damn bored waiting for the BRAZIL match. Wrote and found some of these jokes =p

10 ways to irritate your invigilator/examiner during the exam

1. Complain about the temperature of the room, the lightings and how the environment is NOT conducive for you to sit for the exam.
2. Ask a question immediately before the invigilator is about to say "You may begin"
3. Ask for a pen when you are doing OMR questions.
4. Long after the exam has began, ask the invigilator if the exam has started. This is extremely effective if you didn't collect the question paper.
5. Bring an alarm clock and set it to ring every 5 minutes.
6. Bring cheerleaders.
7. Do the exam with crayons or paint, or flurescent markers.
8. Do the entire exam in another language. If you don't know one, make one up! For math/science exams, try using Roman numerals.
9. Stagger in the exam room with a luggage back filled with 10 year series. As soon as the exam, begin shout "I FAILED!"

IF the first 9 failed miserably, use the following one.

10. During ur chemistry exam, raise your hand to call for the invigilator, ask if the formula for water is HIJKLMNO. The invigilator will stare at you, then you say that your chemistry teacher said it was H to O.

Jokes to relieve exam stress

Female Teacher: Sam, you talk a lot.
Sam: It's a family tradition.
Female Teacher: What do you mean?
Sam: Sir, my grandpa was a street hawker, my father is a teacher.
Female Teacher: What about your mother?
Sam: She's a woman.

TOP 10 SIGNS SOMEONE PLAYS TOO MANY VIDEO GAMES

10. They ask for all their money in quarters.

9. They're not sure what season, or year it is.

8. They're best friends names are Super Mario, Pac-man, and Sonic (if they have real-life friends).

7. The electric company and the toy store sends them birthday cards.

6. Big falling blocks and hot lava pits haunt their dreams.

5. Their fingers twitch all the time.

4. When they are sick at home the change clerk at the arcade calls to see if they are all right.

3. They can play 2 player games by themselves.

2. Everyone at the arcade knows them by name.

1. Someone is reading this to them, 'cause they're too busy getting a new high score and can not be bothered.

TOP TEN THINGS THAT SOUND DIRTY IN GOLF BUT AREN'T

10. Nuts...my shaft is bent.

9. After 18 holes I can barely walk.

8. You really whacked the hell out of that sucker.

7. Look at the size of his putter.

6. Keep your head down and spread your legs a bit more.

5. Mind if I join your threesome?

4. Stand with your back turned and drop it.

3. My hands are so sweaty I can't get a good grip.

2. Nice stroke, but your follow through has a lot to be desired.

1. Hold up...I need to wash my balls first.